Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Bedtime routine: How do you do it?

Our night time routine has gone down the toilet. I am so sad thinking about all the books I used to read to Teilani before bedtime each night and how I don't do nearly the same for Jeyes. By the time night comes, I am exhausted and my patience is very thin. Sometime's I'll read and sometime's I won't. After bath's are complete and teeth are brushed, I just turn off the light's and that is our bedtime routine. Terrible! When I wake up in the morning I feel so much guilt for not making the time to read even just one book. I know it would help settle the kids and provide them with reading skills, but, I still can't seem to snap out my laziness when the time comes. Guilt! Oh, the guilt!

I am especially grateful for Dad's who read books to their kids. Yesterday, I was at the end of my rope with finding things to keep the kids stimulated. Dad had a late night at work and they were determined to stay awake until he walked through the door. You can imagine my relief when that finally happened. I handed over the night owls and took a few minute's for myself in the bedroom with my remote. Once it was too quiet for my liking, I peeked my head around the corner to see what was happening, this is what I found. 

My appreciation goes out to any Mom or Dad that takes the time to read a book to a child. We can only get better each day and I promise to be more for my children today, tomorrow and forever. 

Dear Jarrod:

I love you and appreciate you. Thank you for understanding me and loving me through my unfavorable behavior's. We are so blessed to have a man like you in our life. Keeping you in my prayer's this very busy work week. 

I love you.

~ Tasia 

Monday, May 27, 2013

Boating Adventure: Memorial Day Weekend 2013

Memorial Day weekend was spent with our family of four and some new friends in Hawaii. My heart was singing and dancing all over the place after we were invited to tour Kaneohe Bay on a boat with my babies and husband. My babes have never been on a boat before and I knew this was going to be a life experience we could not turn down. Teilani has no fear of the water and like I imagined, she jumped fearlessly straight into the ocean once we anchored off the bay, and didn't stop swimming until we made her get out and eat lunch. You may remember the rule: Eat first, then rest or else you'll get a cramp! Personally, I hated this rule. But that didn't stop me from making her abide by the wise old tale. Like myself as a child, my little mermaid was squirming to get back into the water and couldn't stand waiting. Five minutes after she finished her lunch (literally) she was snoring on the boat deck and inevitably missed the last of our boat experience. "We'll have another opportunity, be grateful for the time you had" is what I had to repeat to her a handful of times.

Jeyes has been more timid of open water. He clings to me and doesn't want to be let down unless I or Daddy is right by his side. We can't complain too much. After all the horrible stories I've heard pertaining to kid drownings,  I'd rather be safe than sorry when it comes to my brave boy's safety near water. My plan is to enroll both kids in swimming lesson's ASAP if not before/after we settle permanently into a home in Hawaii. Both my sister and I took lesson's when we were younger and I really believe it help build our confidence and everlasting life skills we still use to this day. We never experienced waves like the one's I saw today. Which makes my decision to introduce them to water-skills training even more important than ever. 

Dear Keiki's: 

Watching your feet hit the ocean floor, smelling the salt water, absorbing the sun's warmth, fills my soul with immense love. There is still so much for us to learn on this island. I hope after today you remember this exposure and it last's forever in your heart. We are learning and growing as if I were the same age as you. Which is totally awesome! I see things and it's like I can feel the way you see it through your eyes. What a cool thing! I believe we were brought here together as part of God's plan in our families legacy. As always, I pray everyday and night that he guide's us to our destiny and provides me with the strength and wisdom I need to develop you into strong and independent adults. Thank you for loving me so completely. I can't wait to have more fun with you. 

Alofa Always, 

Mommy Tasia 

Wednesday, May 15, 2013

Aloha from Hawaii!

The past few weeks have been ca-ra-zy! Not like a bad crazy, but, as in I have three ways of handling stress -- 1. freak out  2. do nothing  3. cry ... All of those options suck and don't motivate or help my family in any way. I'd like to say most times I can find a balance and pull it together but that would be a lie. Daddy keeps me focused and driven during times of stress. I NEED him. Which is why flying from Hawaii to the mainland two weeks ago with my babies and without him had my head spinning. I've flown solo with the kids before but this time was even more stressful because I had so many loose ends to tie up on the mainland on top of caring for my babes, and the daily SAHM duties. All of it never seems as bad as I make it when I prioritize and do the best I can. A few phone calls to friends and my hubby usually has me talked off the ledge and back in the game. After the crazy week had ended, we picked Daddy up in San Diego just in time to celebrate Jeyes Jaxon's birthday, then Mother's Day, and finally Teilani's birthday. Let me just say, I aspire to be a pinterest mom who plans elaborate birthday's. Alas, I am not that mom. The only "planning" I did was pawned off on Daddy as he blessed us with a trip to Chuck E. Cheese for a combined birthday (shh, JJ doesn't know it was for Teilani). A dream come true for me! Oh ya, it wasn't for me... haha...anyways... A couple of our dear California friends joined and helped make this night special. I count my blessing's for friendship's like these. I've learned a lot from California. Although gorgeous, close to dear friend's in SD, in the beginning I was depressed. Leaving Las Vegas was difficult. I had finally met some great people and was building relationship's not only for me but for my kids. Then it was time to move again. Being the usual pessimist, I doubted I would find anyone to truly like me for me again. Fait stepped in and what do you know, I met friends who, ahem, actually DO like me. Maybe even love me for just ME. No pretending or judgement, just acceptance and love. What a cool duo!  

So as we wrapped up Teilani's birthday, we rushed back home to finish packing our life into eight suitcases and four carry-on's. The next day we booked it to the airport and flew to Honolulu where we will be for the next two months. Daddy is working his tail off in the office and we are along for the ride. Supporting and loving him through this process. Seven years ago, when I married this man I never dreamed he would bring me to my birthplace to live. Don't get it twisted, I never doubted him. I feel overwhelmed with gratitude and very blessed to experience the beauty of Hawaii. And even more grateful that my kids won't have to guess what it's like to live in paradise but will hopefully remember this special chapter in our life. And will help mold them into the amazing adults they are soon to be. 

Aloha to my friends & family on the mainland and also here in Hawaii! Please know we love you and pray for you always. We're already making plans to visit again this summer and will keep you posted on how that shakes out. Until then... Keep us in your prayer's as we tackle this new and exciting adventure. 

Alofa Always, Tasia   

Sunday, May 12, 2013

Four Birthday Love Letter to Teilani

Dear Teilani:

My Reno, NV girl. Everywhere we go someone somewhere tells you how beautiful you are. But do you really understand what beauty means? Beauty runs deep in your heart and in your actions. You are sensitive just like me. I see the way you care for Jeyes and worry about his safety and that makes me proud. Your not always beaming with excitement about having a two year old boy as your best friend but when I see you two together, playing peacefully, enjoying each other's company it reassures me that the future siblings I am raising have a bond that can never be broken. Sometimes I can be too hard on you and expect too much. I know that. But, after all, I know what it takes to be a big sister and maybe just maybe we can relate to one another more in the future. I try to think of questions you will have about our time spent together during your childhood and I hope that you will always know there are no secrets between us and I will always do my best to provide you with answers. 

In all our travel and since your birth, you are the calm presence in chaos. I could be flying off the handle on the verge of an anxiety driven breakdown and you just tell me - "Calm down, everything is ok". 

Some things I love about you: 

Your favorite color varies every day. Today was pink, yesterday purple. Those are my favorite's too. 

Princess Dolls are a necessity and accessory. They go everywhere and everywhere in your zebra basket or diaper bag from when you were a baby. Which leads me to...

Purses. You are a girly girl and we are completely fine with that. 

Blue Eye shadow. Daddy and I agree you do NOT need it but you love to wear it and think it makes you look pretty for daddy. <-- He IS your prince charming after all... (But he quotes the Macklemore song every time..."The greatest lie the devil ever sold us, was convincing women they look better in their makeup")

Power Rangers, Iron Man, Avenger's & Winks Fairies. These are your most loved shows... for now.

Milkshakes aka Pediasure nutrition supplement. You are allowed two a day because without a limit you would drink us under the table.

The Ocean. You have no fear and dive in without a care in the world. 

Time is absolutely slipping through my fingers. Every day that passes I think of more and more things I want to tell the future "you"... Writing about my love for you, all the things that make you so unique, and how much you have changed my personal identity since your birth gives me strength to face the challenges of motherhood. Keep on soaring through this world fearless and strong-spirited. 

Happy Fourth Birthday!

I love you, my baby girl...

Alofa Always, Mommy Tasia 

Saturday, May 11, 2013

Second Birthday Love Letter to Jeyes

Dear Jeyes Jaxon:

Along the beaches of Oahu, Hawaii is where we brought you weeks before your second birthday. Seeing you observe the waves crash into each other, exploring the feel of warm sand between your toes (and in your mouth - yes, I saw you sneak a taste) was incredible to watch. I couldn't believe my eyes... there you were in the very city I was born, playing on a beach I have dreamed about for almost my entire life. Although you were afraid to go out into the water with us, I know in time you will become braver and before I blink I'll have a fearless surfer boy gliding through the ocean. You are so unbelievably handsome, my boy. I tell you this every. single. day. And smart. Never in your life have you gone one day without me kissing your soft cheeks. Or squeezing your tiny body in my arms. That's a fact, jack! We've spent every day of your life together. Somedays you drive me batty with your not so cute temper tantrums and constant shoving of your hand down the diaper. My hand slams into my forehead as I shake my head at you sometimes and wonder what the heck you are thinking stealing your sister's favorite toy and laughing as she chases you screaming her head off. "Saww-yy" followed with a hug is your way of saying sorry and apologizing. Totally frustrating but yet, absolutely adorable when viewed through my mommy filtered eye-balls. One day sister will understand that you just want her attention. Yes, you are an attention seeker. In our home, all eyes are on you and your latest stunt. You're quite the little rascal you know! Playful, silly and down right awrnry when you choose. I've become a huge fan of the way you grab my face with both your hands and plant your luscious toddler lips on my cheeks mumbling "mmmwah" --  completely melts my body.

When I close my eyes and try to imagine you as an adult in this world, my heart swells with pride. I envision your presence like Daddy's. Nana Murrieta says it best speaking of your Daddy... "He is a big man with a bigger heart and a greater character". I could not agree more. Am I raising you to be of this nature? Will you be honest and loving like your father? What I do know is that I pray for you every day and believe that God will help me guide you to your destiny. 

I hope I never forget the feeling of holding you in my arms for the first time. Incredible and forever life-changing is the best I can do for words to sum up the experience of becoming your mother. If only I could relive this moment again and again and again... On the day you were born, life had a new purpose. And a brand new powerful feeling. My Sonshine, My Baby Boy, My Angel, you will forever have my unconditional love. I am so proud to be your mother. 

Happy Second Birthday, Jeyes!!

I love you, my beautiful Son... 

Alofa "Love" (in Samoan) always, Mommy Tasia